Weekly Re-Up: Jamaican Bobsled Team Theme Song, Kate Upton In Space, & More Posted by Lucas G. on 02/21/14 | Filed under Humor, Fails of the Week, Weekly Re-Up

Listen, it's Friday, we get it. Nobody really wants to do anything that involves using your brain. So the new "Weekly Re-Up" will provide you with both the biggest "Fails" and the most awesome "General Awesomeness", as well as some other must see shit from the week, and of course some boobs. We will also be including a "Weekend Soundtrack" selection to give you something to listen to this weekend. It's a whole lot of everything.

Now let's get started...

General Awesomeness:

Van Down by the River:

Whether it be Allen Iverson playing football or Kanye rapping I am a sucker for "before they were famous" type shit. Rappers and athletes are the usual, but I don't think I have ever seen one of an actor, well, some kind soul found a video of Chris Farley in The Second City improv troop doing the Matt Foley "Down by The River" skit years before we would see it on SNL. The skit, which was recently named the best SNL skit of all time by Rolling Stone is easily some of Farley's best work.

Nobody could steal a scene like Chris Farley and his performances were always so vibrant and magnetic. He was born to be a performer and you don't need the HD, NBC version to see it. Even with a bare-bones set, Farley still makes Foley come to life and takes over the performance. It is such a treat to see this sketch's early days, because here is so much lore surrounding it. Oh and the dad in the skit Bob Odenkirk, better known as Saul from Breaking Bad. As if this wasn't cool enough; the TV nerd in me is acting like a giddy little school girl right now.

Feel The Rythm Feel The Rhyme:
Thanks to Cool Runnings, Academy Award Winner for best movie ever made, the Jamaican Bobsled team is the most popular squad to root for this Olympics; no matter where you are from. First, they didn't have the money, (until an online donation thing raised) then their luggage got lost, but even still Jamaican bobsled team prevails. Wile I have no idea if they even did well, I already know they one the Olympics. Sure Russia and the US have the medals, but the Jamaican bobsled team has their own Reggae tune equipped with an 8-bit video.

2 Chainz would absolutely crush a remix of this song; no doubt in my mind. The Olympics is kind of weird in my opinion because of all the award, political and post-cold war subtexts involved, but while Russians, Canadians, and Americans are (not so) passively beefing, everyone can get behind the Jamaican bobsled team. The feel good story of the Olympics just got the song of the century and I couldn't be more happy. The song also synchs up with the time it takes for the run assuming of course, they don't crash and have to walk it across as a slow clap starts. Oh and they have a lucky egg because of course.

They might not have won any medals, but the Jamaican bobsled team won our hearts; it's like a real

In Case You Missed It:
Maybach Mumu: 3 New Rick Ross Endorsed Products
The Rapper vs. Journalist War is Coming, Pick Your Side Carefully

Best Of The Rest:
Olympic Skier from Colorado Loses It When He Sees His Score Is 4.20
Rob Ford Gets Air
Clint Dempsey Names Bun B, Pimp C & Swisha House As Influences
A Savvy Girl Scout Is Selling Cookies at a Cannabis Clinic in San Francisco

Fails Of The Week:
He's Different...

I knew this had to be in the Re-Up, but I was torn as to whether or not it was a fail or an awesomeness. On the one hand anybody who loves 2 Chainz that much is failing, but a part of me respects the fuck out of this guy. I consider myself a pretty passionate hip-hop head, but this guy takes it to another level. I wish I loved something as much as Scotty boy loves Chainzy. It was admirable for a minute, but then he started spiraling out of control; like, it's just 2 Chainz dude. Never before has anyone said 2 Chainz and "transcendent" in the same sentence; I shudder to think about this guys reaction when he first heard "She got a big booty so I call her Big Booty". It got a little creepy though right around the point where he said he wanted to be buried in those shoes and borderline insane when he threatened to start fighting people. I know hes like a 50 pound dude, but there is no way in hell I would ever fight this guy. One minute you are making fun of 2 Chainz the next you end up in his basement on some Buffalo Bill shit with him dancing around to "I'm Different" right before he makes a suit out of your skin; no thanks.

Sham Dunk Contest
Hanging on the wall next my bet is a glorious poster Dominque Wilkins in the '88 dunk contest which I got for five bucks at a yard sale; a steal! Every time I look at it, I think about how great that contest was and how great the dunk contest used to be. If you are ever bored an have an hour to kill, check out the older dunk contests. Now the dunk contest has being going downhill for some time now, but still, it reached new lows last weekend.

Sure the format is weird, sure nobody really cares abotu the east vs. west, sure they seem more like advertisements and rapper-filled spectacles, but that isn't what gets me. The fact the the leagues best dunkers like Lebron, Blake, and Dwight, are all to scared to to spend 30 minutes doing cool dunks. Those old contests are so much fun because the best players in the league were dunking and each one really wanted to win; it was actually an honor to be a dunk contest winner. To this day the losses in the Dunk contest still eat at Nique. Do you think Terrance Ross will lose any sleep that his Drake dunk didn't beat John Wall, who had the only memorable dunk in the whole contest. I'm sure the Western conference will be losing sleep they didn't win the "freestyle round" full of downright boring dunks. I'm not one of those people who glorifies the 80's and 90's but still, as a basketball fan, you have to be disappointed to see just how unoriginal, unenergetic, and contrived the dunk contest has become. For being freak physical specimens, there 6'5 superstars sure are babies.

Worst Of The Rest:
Big Boi Says There There's No Planned OutKast Album
"Pasta In Excess," And Other Self-Reported NCAA Violations At OU
Rick Ross Feat. French Montana “Nobody”
Biathlete Celebrates Early, Nearly Blows Gold

Weekend Soundtrack:

So many albums to choose from. Just kidding, it's gonna be Oxymoron; duh! Haven't had the chance to really sit down and get to know it yet, but I have a feeling I will be selling drugs by Sunday evening. It's not out, out yet, but we got you covered right here.

Booty Of The Week:

                                                        

Depending on who you ask, Kate Upton might be the hottest woman on the planet. What isn't up for debate though, is the fact that now, she is the hottest woman in space. Okay she isn't technically in space, but it's close enough right. Kate hopped in a zero gravity chamber in a bikini (of course) for Sports Illustrated. Not really sure what this has to do with sports or the swimsuit issue, but the results are out of this world. Sorry for the terrible pun, this  Gif should make up for it though.

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