Fails of the Week: Rossman’s New Album, Tiddies On My Head & More Posted by Nathan S. on 05/17/13 | Filed under Top Stories, Humor, Fails

The dictionary defines "Schadenfreude" as pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others. In that case, we're about to get Schadenfreude like a motherfucker up in this piece.

For the latest edition of "Fails of the Week" (aka your favorite running column that doesn't involve random hot girls) I tackle the Rick Ross and Birdman album no one was waiting for, tiddies on my head and much more.

Enjoy...

Here's the Ross x Birdman Album No One Was Waiting For


Here's the transcript from a phone conversation Rick Ross and I had earlier this week:

Rick Ross: I wanted to call you personally to make sure you post me and Birdman's collab album next week.
Me: What collab album?
Ross: You know, that one we recorded in '08? We're finally releasing it.
Me: Nope, not ringing a bell.
Ross: Come on, sure you remember. Everyone's been talking about it for the last five years.
Me: ....I've got nothing. Don't remember a thing.
Ross: Well...anyway, it's going to have DJ Khaled hosting...
Me: I'm sorry, I'm going through a tunnel, I think I'm losing you. (Makes static noise)
Ross: Hello? Hello? (Dial tone.)

And...scene.

Less Rappin, More Catchin


Here's the bad news. Jay Harris had a football scholarship to Michigan State revoked after he instead chose to pursue a career in rap...and by any account he's a terrible rapper...and will forever be known as "the kid who passed up a scholarship to be a terrible rapper."

Here's the good news. Realistically, he probably wasn't going to make the NFL. Hopefully now he'll try out the rapper thing, it won't work, he'll go to college, graduate, and become a generally successful human being (I recommend becoming an orthodontist), without having to go through four more years of concussions. So he's got that going for him.

Side note, who's the white kid at the :08 mark? That's the kid I'm interested in.

Titties Tiddies On My Head


I've now watched "Tiddie On My Head" so many times that it's gone from hilariously terrible, to just terrible, back to hilariously terrible, and is now sitting exactly somewhere between the two. Look, it's obviously a joke, but there's a point at which even a good joke doesn't make watching a grown man's c-cups bounce around enjoyable.

On the plus side, I'm now determined to use the term "titty scrub" at some point today. I highly recommend you do the same.

(All praise due to @BauceSauce for the find.)

I Will Always Fail You


This isn't even remotely rap related, but...this video of a woman getting kicked off a plane for refusing to stop singing Whitney Houston songs is secretly the funniest shit I've seen all week. Right at the :20 mark when she really goes for the high note? Pure comedy gold. You're welcome.

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