Fails of the Week: Lauryn Hill Goes Balls Crazy, Lil Wayne Fights Racism & More

So....Lauryn Hill is Balls Crazy Now

This week Lauryn Hill became the latest celebrity to get run up on by the IRS as the Feds charged her with failing to pay her taxes for a solid three years. As a result, Lauryn faces up to a year in jail and $100K in fines.

Rappers “forget” to pay their taxes, it happens, a lot. But it turns out that Lauryn actually has a far better excuse than say Sean Garrett or Method Man...she’s balls crazy.

In a rambling, several thousand word, at times barely comprehensible statement to the press, Lauryn blamed a “media protected military industrial complex” for her legal troubles:

“When I was working consistently without being affected by the interferences mentioned above, I filed and paid my taxes. This only stopped when it was necessary to withdraw from society, in order to guarantee the safety and well-being of myself and my family.”

So basically you decided to stop paying taxes and the government wasn’t happy about it. Yeah, that will happen.

Like most balls crazy people, there are some real elements of truth to her ramblings. As far as I can determine, she stopped making music both because she thought it was fucked up that other people were getting rich off her for doing nothing, and because she felt like she couldn’t make the music she wanted to. So, basically the Dave Chappelle retirement plan. Fair enough, but even Chappelle wouldn’t write something like:

“It was this schism and the hypocrisy, violence and social cannibalism it enabled, that I wanted and needed to be freed from, not from art or music, but the suppression/repression and reduction of that art and music to a bottom line alone, without regard for anything else.”

In a way this is good news. I had little to no hope that Lauryn would ever make another album, but now that I know just how far she’s fallen off the sanity wagon, that hope is completely dead. Good times.

(p.s. - It’s a good thing the media protected military industrial complex wasn’t involved in Summer Jam so she could perform.)