Rick Rubin Didn’t Work on “Magna Carta”? We Just Got Hip-Hop Catfished Posted by Lucas Garrison on 07/02/13 | Filed under Opinion, Rick Rubin

If you are like me, you have been fiending for Magna Carta Holy Grail in the worst way. Said thirst, might have you watching the epic 3-minute long commercial, where Jay is seen in the lab with a few conspirators, over and over looking for clues as to what can be expected on the much anticipated project. In the commercial Jay is seen chopping it up with Rick Rubin, Pharrell, Timbaland and Swizz Beatz. While logic might lead you to believe that all of them had hand in crafting the album, this is hip-hop so all logic goes out the window. While he is one of the more prominent, intriguing characters in the commercial, as it turns out, Rick Rubin, has absolutely zero input on MCHG. On the subject, Rubin told XXL:

The point of me being in the commercials was that he was filming a documentary and he asked me—I imagine he’s just comfortable talking to me—to come listen to the songs with him and just talk about the songs. Just listen to it and talk about it, and that’s what we did. It was fun.” He went on to divulge what he initially thought of Magna Carta, saying, “I liked what I heard, but it was a little difficult—after just coming from the Kanye sessions—to listen to Jay’s album, because they’re so different. I was in a very alternative and progressive headspace, and Jay’s record is a more traditional hip-hop record.

Now I know what Manti Te’o feels like, because Hov/Samsung totally catfished us. Considering, you know, he was in the commercial one might think Rick had something to do with the album, but now we find out it was just a shameless cameo. Personally, I don’t buy his explanation. Maybe if the cameras weren’t there I could see it, but its not like Jay invited him over and then Samsung just happened to show up; all of that s***t was planned. Everything on every commercial on TV is done on purpose; things don’t just happen by accident, they are placed there for a reason. Rubin didn’t just coincidentally show up on that day. They knew he would add an aura to the album and make it all the more buzzworthy so he was paid him to come in, take off his shoes, and sit on a couch. It is a pretty big c*ck tease, we should have known better because hip-hop has been catfishing us for years.

While Eminem is one of the more straightforward, honest emcees, that doesn’t mean he hasn’t ever duped us. Everyone knows his famous intro “Where’s my snare. I have no snare in my headphones”, but what you don’t know and probably missed in the video might surprise you. The spooky, piano-centered boardwork was a product of Em, himself, and Jeff Bass, but in the video for the song, you see Dr. Dre behind the boards, turning up the snare. Well, that is quite misleading isn’t it? I would say maybe Dre was actually in the studio session with him, but I really doubt he still does all the mixing/mastering on his own cuts let alone Em’s. Like Rubin, Dre showed up, did nothing, and got paid. Not a bad life I guess.



Does anything get you more juiced than seeing “featuring _____ [enter favorite artist here]”? No right? On The Game’s last album, Jesus Piece, the title cut featured Kanye West and Common. Common and Game did their thing, but those waiting for Kanye will be severely disappointed because he doesn’t have a verse and he didn’t produce the cut either. He is sampled on the chorus, his only input to the song. Last time I checked, six words is not a feature. I get why he did it—you mention Kanye, in any context, and people come running—but it just feels so wrong. When you have a song “featuring” two of the Chi’s best, I expect at least a verse from each. I got the same feeling after this song, I did when I got an action figure as a kid; sure its good, but when you see the sweet things they do in the commercial, the actual toy is kind of a let down.



The only person who is better at catfishing than DJ Khaled The Fat Guy Who Yells is Ronaiah Tuiasosopo/ Lennay Kekua. The man has made a living of making it seem like he did does something without actually doing anything. Need an example? Just check out any of his songs, literally, any one of them. Perhaps the most emboldened catfish from DJ Khaled The Fat Guy Who Yells however, was on “Grammy Family”. While the song’s heavy lifting was done by Consequence, John Legend and Kanye, the were all just the features; the real star of the show was DJ Khaled The Fat Guy Who Yells, who didn’t say a single thing (shocking) and didn’t even produce the track (that nod goes to Ye and Jon Brion). Even more catfishing took place when DJ Khaled The Fat Guy Who Yells had the balls to put “Grammy Family” on his 2006 project, Listennn... The Album. This might be the first song on an artist’s album, that doesn’t feature the artist. I can’t hate though, I wish someone would pay me a bunch of money to pick any artist I want and put them on a song together. Oh by the way, adding another mini-catfish, DJ Khaled The Fat Guy Who Yells has never won a Grammy, making “Grammy Family” all the more deceiving.



Oh and Detox… The following interview is from 2011...

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