Beyonce vs. Monica Lewinsky on “Partition"s Ejaculation Slang Posted by Nathan S. on 05/08/14 | Filed under Humor, Opinion, Rap Lines That Make No Sense

Man, it's been a long time since I've written a "Rap Lines That Make No Fucking Sense". I don't know what to say, it's not like there's a shortage of material as long as Lil Wayne is still putting out rap music. My apologies, I'm sorry. But it appears that there is one thing that will make me come out of my (semi) retirement, Monica Lewinsky and Beyonce (semi) arguing about proper ejaculation slang. 

First off, let's all take a moment to watch "Partition" again because there's never a bad time to watch "Partition". Sweet baby jesus, this "Partition" video...I just....I don't know how I'm supposed to write a coherent sentence after this. 

Goddamn, I need a moment....

Ok, so, let's finally get to the point. Even before the video dropped that was a great song, and obviously one of the most memorable lines was: 

 "Oh he so horny, yeah he want to fuck. He popped all my buttons, and he ripped my blouse/He Monica Lewinsky-ed all on my gown."

Come on Hov, there's not even a towel in that old school Rolls Royce? Anyway, it's obviously a great line, especially for those of us old enough to have lived through the Bill Clinton scandal; I can only hope that "Lewinsky-ed" becomes common slang. 

But oh wait, what's this? The woman herself, Monica Lewinsky, decided to go after Queen B and drop her own "Rap Lines That Make No Fucking Sense". Well, well then. I seems only fair that we hear what she has to say. After all, the (newly coined) sex act is named after her.  

Thanks, Beyoncé. But if we’re verbing, I think you meant 'Bill Clinton’d all on my gown,' not ‘Monica Lewinsky’d.'" - Monica Lewinsky in Vanity Fair

At first glace that seemed like a solid point from Lewinsky, although obviously very buzzkilly. I get why you don't want your name so closely associated with spermal explosions Monica, but that ship has kind of sailed. Let the rest of us have some fun. 

But then I started to really think about it, and I might just have to his Lewinsky with a #wellactually. Obviously, Lewinsky is taking "Monica Lewinsky-ed" to literally mean "ejaculated", in which case yes, it'd make more sense to say "Bill Clinton-ed", since Beyonce/Lewinksy isn't the one doing the ejaculating (don't make me go there).

But after further reflection, that's a rather shallow interpretation. In "Partition", "Monica Lewinsky-ed" means more than just "to ejaculate", it's far more specific than that. In fact, after giving this some serious thought, I'm ready to argue that Beyonce's using "Monica Lewinsky-ed" to mean something closer to "to ejaculate on someone's clothing in a potentially publicly embarassing manner", in which case it really does still make sense to call it "Monica Lewinsky-ed" and not "Bill Clintoned". (In other words, "Monica Lewinsky-ed" is a passive verb, not an active verb. I'm really glad that English degree is really paying off.) 

I'm really going to have to continue to think this one through, but right now I'm ready to side with Beyonce. And yes, this is really making me realize how much I loved the complete and total waste of time very serious research that was "Rap Lines That Make No Fucking Sense". I promise, I'll never let another hiatus last this long. 

RefinedHype has merged with The DJBooth. It's the same articles you loved on RefinedHype, new address. For more info, check out the official announcement.