Rap Lines That Make No F**king Sense: The Rick Ross Edition Posted by Nathan S. on 09/22/10 | Filed under Top Stories, Features, Rap Lines That Make No Sense, Rick Ross

And we're back. After a bit of a hiatus, everyone's favorite RefinedHype series that doesn't involve booty or money, "Rap Lines That Make No F**king Sense" is back, and since I took out Drake the last time around, I thought I'd aim at the other biggest (literally) rap star in the game, Rick Ross. And, because it'd be too easily to simply point out all the times Ross claiming to be a drug lord makes no sense, I just concentrated on the lyrics themselves. Enjoy.

Rick Ross - B.M.F.

"Look at yourself / now look at me / You can't see a nigga / I'm what you used to be."

I heard this one about 100 times before I realized it made no f**king sense. First, if they can't see you Rick, how are they supposed to look at you? Second, "I'm what you used to be"? I'm pretty sure you mean "I'm want you want to be" Ricky. it's a little complicated, so let's take it one step at a time. First, I'm assuming the people Ross is talking to are poorer and less powerful than him. So if he is what they used to be, wouldn't that also make him poor and not powerful? Unless he's specifically talking to haters who were once as rich as him, but have now fallen off. Whatever. My brain hurts.

Rick Ross - Super High

I'm beatin niggas by margins as large as Fran Tarkenton

Talk about random. For those not up on their NFL history, Fran Tarkenton was an All-Pro quarterback for the Vikings and later the Giants in the '70s. First, the idea that the huge, black Rick Ross is comparing himself to a guy who looks like this is hilarious. Second, while Tarkenton was certainly a great quarterback, it's not like he was known to win games by big margins. In fact, his three Super Bowl losses made him on of the biggest chokers in NFL history. On the other hand, he does have the fifth most rushing yards by a QB in NFL history, so Rick clearly should have gone with "I run this game like Fran Tarkenton." Don't make a weak sports analogy and expect me not to call you out on it.

Rick Ross - "Deeper Than Rap"

"Celebratin wealth, pourin Moet in her hair / Excuse me, her weave - the bluest of weed / Trunk full of white, car smell like blue cheese."

I'm confused, why does your car smell like blue cheese? I'm no cocaine dealer, but I'm pretty sure a trunk full of the stuff doesn't smell like blue cheese. Of course, this lines makes perfect sense if you just take it super literally. Rick Ross enjoys eating blue cheese. He was eating some while riding in his car. Now the car smells like blue cheese. The line could have just as easily been "Car smell like Subway" if "Subway" happened to rhyme with "weed".

Rick Ross - "Free Mason" (Into)

This is for the soldiers the see the sun at midnight, ya dig?

No, I don't dig. Is that a metaphor for drug dealers who work all night (a.k.a. most people's night is their work day)? If so, they still wouldn't see the sun at midnight, unless Rick is specifically talking about drug dealers who live in Alaska, where the sun is out for days at a time. Or is this some sort of archaic Masonry reference I don't get. Considering the last time I wrote about the Masons one of them got angry about it, I'm just going to let this one go before I wake up at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean.

Rick Ross - "MC Hammer"

My baddest bitch is Latin but they call me loco

"But"? What do you mean "but"? If your baddest bitch is a Latina of course she might call you loco. And who is "they"? I thought we were just talking about one girl? "My baddest bitch is Latin, she call me loco" or "All my baddest bitches Latin, they call me loco", those both make sense. But what you have? Sorry Ricky, that makes no f**king sense.

Know other Rick Ross lines that make no f**king sense? Throw them in the comments below, or email me at nathan(@)refinedhype.com.

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