General Awesomeness: The Top Five Quotes From “Straight Outta Dogtown” Kai’s Epic Interview Posted by Danielle Harling on 02/05/13 | Filed under Videos, General Awesomeness

If you ever had any question about who or what qualifies as general awesomeness then let me introduce you to Kai, the hatchet-wielding hitchhiker who's about to become the world's newest viral sensation. In an interview with a local news station, Kai shared the story of how he saved a handful of people from the wrath of a six-foot, 300 to 400-pound "Jesus" and as expected the interview is absolutely littered with amazing, hilarious, and even thought-provoking quotes from the Dogtown representer.

"No matter what you've done you deserve respect. Even if you make mistakes you're lovable and it doesn't matter your look, skills, or age, or size, or anything you're worth while. No one can ever take that away from you."

Well, those heart-warming words are exactly what I expected to hear before a story about how someone attacked a madman with a hatchet.

"So I f**kin ran up behind him with a hatchet. Smash! Smash! SaaaaaMASH!"

Ladies and gentleman, that three seconds just secured Kai's place in YouTube history.

"F**k is cool. That guy ain't. Shiiit."

Words to live by people, words to live by.

"If you're f**kin Jesus Christ, I'll be the anti-Christ man. Like f**k that sh*t."

Combine one-part amazing and one-part gangster rapper and you get that quote.

Reporter: "How old are you?" Kai: "I can't call it."

Age ain't nothing but a number anyway.