Fails of the Week: Ray J Hits Last, Chris Brown Plays Nice & More Posted by Nathan S. on 04/05/13 | Filed under Fails of the Week, Humor

The dictionary defines "Schadenfreude" as pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others. In that case, we're about to get Schadenfreude like a motherfucker up in this bitch.

For the latest edition of "Fails of the Week" (aka your favorite running column that doesn't involve random hot girls) I tackle Ray J's latest desperate attempt at relevancy, Chris Brown's friendly sweater campaign and more.

Enjoy...

Ray J Definitely Didn't Hit It First


Here's how you know you're getting desperate for attention. Your name is Ray J, you name your new single "I Hit It First", you use a pixelated image of Kim Kardashian for your art work and, perhaps most telling, you announce that you'll be premiering your new single on TMZ.

So yeah, life's going completely fine for Ray J, thanks for asking. He's completely not a broken, lonely shell of a human being.

p.s. - ONLY DJ CLUE CAN SQUASH THIS NOW!!!

Chris Brown Wears Fluffy Sweater, Is Still a Dick


This week Chris Brown went on the Today Show (the location of a previous tantrum) wearing a sweater so fluffy it would make Drake feel emasculated to insist that he was a changed man who was now only interested in hugs, providing milk to orphaned puppies, and installing clean water wells in rural Honduras (more or less).

Fantastic, I'm genuinely glad to hear that he's a changed man. Oh wait, what's that? Hours later he dropped a freestyle dissing former bottle throwing opponent Drake, and then went on to drop this gem in an interview? "I know aint nothing gonna happen so I say whatever I want. Rebuttals is gonna be stupid, I’m not a rapper. So you’re gonna be stupid rapping back to a singer, but I’ma keep coming nigga, I don’t care.”

See, this is why Chris Brown isn't allowed to have nice things.

"Period Rap"...I Rest My Case


Oh fucks no. Oh fucks the fucks fuckity fuck mcfucksalot no. I mean I'm Jim Harbaugh level upset about this.

(You can blame @eddieftw for this one.)

In Case You Missed It:

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Internet Catches Idiot Subway Mugger Who Wore His Frat Sweats to the Crime
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Here's The Video Of Mike Rice Abusing His Players
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