This Is My Rifle: Introducing “Pyramids In Stereo” Posted by Jason James on 07/25/12 | Filed under Features, Opinion, This Is My Rifle

"That's it! It's a wrap!"- And with that said I hung up the headphones, walked out of the recording booth and closed another chapter of my life.

It took 2 years for this album to become what Rodney Hazard and I originally envisioned. Unlike our prior effort, "Marvelous World Of Color", I wrote this project from start to finish before I even stepped foot into a studio and had a blueprint of how I wanted this story to be told mapped out in mind prior to laying any of my vocals. It took approximately one year for me to build the 20-25 songs that would be the foundation for "Pyramids In Stereo", and another 10 months of recording and re-writing, then re-recording and re-writing again, to find the 13 songs that we felt would best represent us at this particular period in time.

The completion of an album is always a bittersweet victory. On one hand, it feels great to have a finished body of work that you can hold up proudly and present to any and everybody who may be interested. But on the other hand it's a somber feeling knowing that it's over. It's a hard sentiment to explain. I guess it could be comparable to a parent dropping their child off at his or her first day of school; you know that they're still your baby and always will be, but in that moment you also know that the nature of your relationship has changed. Your child will now experience the world without you present and you are no longer able to remove the negative aspects of life and re-arrange them into something that is better suited for their lack of understanding and under-developed character. You have done everything you can to prepare them for this day and now all you can do is have faith that the world will receive them with open arms. They will be subject to harsh criticism and ridicule, but hopefully they will suffer less than other children that weren't fortunate enough to be raised with the same care that yours was.

It sounds ridiculous to try and draw a comparison between a parent's love for their child and an artist's passion for his or her work, but the level of intimacy involved is almost identical. We know every imperfection; every scratch, nick, scrape and bruise that our creation has endured and when we observe it we can pick out areas where we could've been better. We can see past the polished exterior and we cringe when we have to face the misplaced notes or words that stand out like a bright lights in a dark tunnel. On good days we convince ourselves that this is part of what makes our art important and that nobody will notice the blemishes, and on bad days it’s all we can hear- like nails on a chalk board it tortures us and makes us feel like we failed.

We remember the studio sessions where everything came together perfectly. When we nailed the song in one or two takes and we did it so effortlessly we almost believed that we were indeed THAT good. The next week would be one of our best- a creative utopia where we were not afraid to explore our creativity and bend a little further. We would encourage ourselves to strive for artistic feats that we once thought were impossible. For this short window of time we were invincible.

But then we also remember the studio sessions that were a total disaster. Standing in a hot recording booth, dripping sweat and pacing back and forth, drowning in the depths of despair frantically trying to save a sinking ship. With every take, the song that we so desperately wished would work out, coming further unraveled as the words smash against the instruments chaotically trying to force themselves into pockets that once seemed wide open but are now smaller than a pin prick. Pushing and re-working the song until you finally accept that it's lost forever. The experience is devastating and for the following week you find yourself questioning everything from your talent (or lack there of) to your very existence.

Now I've reached the end. As much as I dread the overwhelming depression I inflict upon myself during the process of recording an album, I live for those days when I believe that I am what my ego is intent on telling me I am at least 50 times a minute in my head- a great MC. When I think about what it is that motivates me to fight through the war that is the making of an album, I have a hard time putting it into words. I don't particularly like any of it. Writing songs, especially when they don't take shape as I envisioned them, consumes so much of my energy that if I could help it I'd not do it. And recording them is always an emotional gamble- if it works, I'm ecstatic, if not, I wanna jump off a bridge. But for whatever reason, I have to create. I have an obsessive compulsion inside of me that bully's me and develops my ideas into something I can share with the world. Maybe its my ego that causes me to assume that I have something valid to say, or maybe there's some divine force driving me to continue on. Whatever it is, it's what keeps me alive and defines me as a person.

So as we finish mixing and mastering "Pyramids In Stereo", I can feel that nervous energy building inside of me again. After everything I've gone through, every internal struggle I've faced these past 2 years, I just hope I'm giving you all something that will have some significance to you. Even if it’s just one verse from one song that you connect with, that's good enough for me. I don't care about fame or money or “hits”- when it all comes down to it I just wanna make something that everybody out there can relate to. I am also proud to announce that “This Is My Rifle” has been turned into a book that will be included with the album for free download. The book will be a collection of articles I’ve written over the past 2 years, handwritten lyrics for all of the songs from “Pyramids In Stereo” and will feature artwork from my long-time friend, Joe “Masaro” Gianoglio. Since this column has become as much a part of me as the music I figured it was only right to put them both together and let the world get a glimpse of my perspective from all sides.

Ok. I don’t really know how to end this so I’ll just say; Jason James & Rodney Hazard- “Pyramids In Stereo” and “This Is My Rifle”- words by: Jason James and artwork by Joe “Masaro” Gianoglio coming very, very soon. See you then!

See Also: This Is My Rifle: The Night I Saw a UFO

(Jason James is an artist, freelance columnist and writer for RefinedHype.com. You can listen/download his most recent album, "Marvelous World Of Color", here and you can contact him here and here.)

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