Albums That Deserve Another Chance: Mike Jones “Who Is Mike Jones?” Posted by Burmy on 02/11/11 | Filed under Features, Albums That Deserve Another Chance, Mike Jones

You know, my favorite album reviews are the ones where a hard case is made...I'm getting back into that vibe now, after my last review of the pre-"We the Best" Khaled's album. So I figured it's time I looked at another name from the Dirty South who's been the punchline of a whole bunch of hip-hop jokes. Who? Mike Jones!

A fixture on Houston's underground mixtape circuit, Mike Jones broke into the game by linking with Michael "5000" Watts and his Swishahouse camp (which at the time had a who's-who of H-Town, from Chamillionaire to Slim Thug to Paul Wall). His first taste of success was on the 2003 Swishahouse compilation "The Day Hell Broke Loose 2: Major Without a Major Deal," particularly its breakout track "Still Tippin'". One of the favorites of BET: Uncut, it struck at the right time (after Luda's "P-Poppin'" but before Nelly's "Tip Drill"). This led to major rotation on radio stations across America, and major deals for everyone involved-Slim Thug went to Star Trak/Interscope, Paul Wall to Atlantic, and Mike Jones right to Warner Bros, where he finally found a home for his much-hyped debut, "Who Is Mike Jones?"

While it got mainstream attention and went platinum plus, many hip-hop heads saw this album (and Jones himself) as a complete joke. However, at the Hype, we strive to be as neutral as possible, leading us to ask the question: Does it indeed have a place in Southern hip-hop history? Let's give it another chance!

(Note, I am keeping track of each of Jones' three trademarks: shouting out his name, his phone number, and repeating lines. After each track will display a count of each one)

#1 "Intro"
Basically an excited Jones shouting out how the long-awaited album is finally here, then asking fans to look for his then-upcoming sophomore set "The American Dream," before shouting out his phone number of (281)-330-8004 and his website of whomikejones.com (one doesn't work anymore, the other is never updated). At the time, it was the best self-promo anyone could think of. So let's keep going.
Name: 2 Number: 1 Repeated lines: 0

#2 "Back Then"
When it came time for Warner Bros. to drop a single which actually showed Jones going solo, this was chosen (and remains his biggest solo hit to this day). Jones talks about how he was at the bottom rung of the popularity ladder before his success, but climbed up as soon as he got into hip-hop and the money started pouring in. (Trust me, I can relate to this scenario). Salih Williams chops up a sample of his closing line from his "Still Tippin'" verse (as if it wasn't easy enough to remember back in '03), capping off this rags-to-riches epitome.
Name: 5 Number: 1 Repeated lines: 4

#3 "Flossin' (ft. Big Moe)"
Jones brings in an Original Screwed Up Click alumnus in this total H-Town tribute, as the Swishahouse and the Wreckshop each show off their mixture of brightness and class in the streets, from the ride down to the jewelry. Mike B flips a sample of "We've Only Just Begun" to make this minimalistic but smooth banger, best played when cruising in your ride on a sunny day through the suburbs.
Name: 15 Number: 0 Repeated lines: 1

#4 "Still Tippin' (ft. Slim Thug & Paul Wall)"
That track which sped him up to the fame in the first place. Since I've already given the video link, here are some interesting facts: 1. It originally had Chamillionaire on the last verse and a different beat, but once he left the House and started his feud with Jones, he was replaced with Paul Wall on the last verse and the beat was switched (the original can be seen here). 2. Many Southern hip-hop fans wonder why the track didn't go on Slim Thug's "Already Platinum" (after all, his verse stood out and his sample was on the hook)...which adds fuel to an already-bitter hatred they maintain for Jones. Regardless, enjoy.
Name: 4 Number: 0 Repeated lines: 4

#5 "Got It Sewed Up (Remix)"
A remix of his solo underground mixtape anthem (from the same place Still Tippin' debuted), Jones respits his old verses, with a slight alteration ("'Who Is Mike Jones' comin'" becomes "'Who Is Mike Jones' is here"). DJ Paul and Juicy J flip the sample from Tchaikovsky's "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" to add some true trunk-bang power!
Name: 10 Number: 2 Repeated lines: 8

#6 "Scandalous Hos (ft. Lil' Bran)"
A true ode to one of the sadder realities of the limelight-the gold-digging females. As Jones so eloquently puts it:

"Now that you stackin up dollars, these hoes now wanna holla
They wanna be on your team, they wanna know all about'cha
They wanna ride on your ride, they wanna be by your side
until the day that you die, that's what they tellin you, right?
They sayin they wanna commit, because your paper legit
The minute you go bankrupt the second they gon' split!
Now yo' ass ain't got shit
Listenin to that bitch got you flat broke quick!
If you was straight from the streets you'll know that that bitch
was from the jump a hoe, playin you for your dough,
But I guess you thought I was hatin when I was keepin it real
I'll bet you gon' listen now cause she got you for your scrill.
So let this lesson be told to those who got caught
You tried to pay for some pussy that already been bought
You told the hoe where you lived, cause you thought that the bitch was real
Same time she brought one of them niggaz inside your crib
I can't let it happen to me, so I watch 'em from 50 feet
I'd rather have money comin than be with these scandalous freaks!"

Well-said Mike. Kojack's sample of The Stylistic's "You Are Everything" certainly provides the fitting background. The only question I really have is: why did Lil' Bran never blow up? His hook vocals sound like a Southern Nate Dogg's: "I, can't, stand you scandalous hooooooooos!" and were extremely easy to remember.
Name: 4 Number: 0 Repeated lines: 1

#7 "Screw Dat"
Once again, Salih brings the beat for another supremely-catchy Southern rap jam. "We gon' screw dat" will be in your head for a loooong time after you hear this, I guarantee it!
Name: 3 Number: 1 Repeated lines: 1

#8 "Turning Lane"
OK...a high-energy track with a beat suited for the strip clubs, but it's about cars driving. Come to think of it, this beat by Young Sears is actually meant to emulate a high-speed chase, as Jones wilds out-you guessed it-in the turning lane! They say everything's bigger in Texas-well at least everything about Jones is bigger on this track (we see the most usage of his trademarks here).
Name: 14 Number: 4 Repeated lines: 2 "In the turning lane"s: 31

(Halftime note: So far we got 57 name drops, 9 number drops, and 21 repeated lines. Could it double by the time it ends? We'll see...this is entertaining!)

#9 "Laws Patrolling (ft. CJ, Mellow, & Lil' Bran)"
Ice Age's Big Four all represent on this track, dedicated to Jones making sure the HPD never comes to lock him up. CJ and Mellow each represent for their own values regardless of what these cops say, whereas Lil' Bran once again comes out strong (seriously, why did we never hear from him again after this?) Truly an ideal banger for those avoiding police-of course, it has since been supplanted in a mere six months by Mike Jones' old nemesis.
Name: 4 Number: 0 Repeated lines: 0

#10 "5 Years From Now (ft. Lil' Bran)"
Mike Jones at his deepest...the first verse is a direction we would hope he could keep going (as Face, Bun, Z-Ro and the like have all done):

"I live life daily, scared to make babies
It's hard to plan your future when the world goin crazy
Kids with no food, who can they turn to
beside they own people, I swear this world evil
They see us on TV, they thinkin we should be
The main ones providin for our community
But the government is paid, dishin out minimum wage
They don't care about the streets, as long as they get paid
My advice is please vote, don't take it as a joke
Cause five years from now the world could be gone in smoke
Now everybody's gone, cause they ain't stand strong
And vote for a leader that can lead our country home
We got people in Iraq, tell me why they can't come home
If you care about your future please listen to the song"

The next two verses obviously have Jones wondering how his life would go in 2010-whether he'd be successful and win Grammys, get married and have kids or fall apart, get locked up, and/or end up dead? (Note: "I keep the Lord on my side, 'til the day I die/Will I blow up big? I don't know but I'll try" is officially added to my favorites). Truly one of the better songs of 2005-unfortunately, he let the fame go to his head, so we have our answer as to where he is now that 5 years have passed.
Name: 3 Number: 0 Repeated lines: 2

#11 "Cuttin' (Remix)"
Back to the feel-good bangers we go-this time with a solo remix of his well-known Magno collabo track on "1st Round Draft Picks". The old teamwork-oriented flavor is gone, replaced by his solo stuntin'. Nonetheless, Salih's beat remains intact (it takes real cajones to sample pure yodelers on your instrumental!)
Name: 11 Number: 2 Repeated lines: 6

#12 "What Ya Know About (ft. Paul Wall & Killa Kyleon)"
The Grid.Iron provides another hard-hitting beat, as Jones boasts about Houston's custom car specialty. Paul Wall chips in, even name-dropping DJ Screw by his government name. However, it's Killa Kyleon's verse that's the most memorable, typical of one of the classic UGK or SUC verses that put Texas on the map (and should have spawned so many samples).
Name: 0 Number: 1 Repeated lines: 1

#13 "Know What I'm Sayin' (ft. Bun B & Lil Keke)"
Truly a jam session if I ever saw one, with Mike Jones trying to measure up against the two Lone Star legends-the challenge being they can only spit three bars at a time before the "Know what I'm sayin?/Know what I'm talkin' bout?" kicks in. Obviously, Bun shines head and shoulders above the rest, but Jones & Keke actually spit some similar verses to make this too close to call between them.
Name: 4 Number: 2 Repeated lines: 1

#14 "Type Of Nigga U Need (ft. Brighteyes)"
The song that would set the tone for his comeback attempt in '08-'09. Around that time Jones would start doing more raps "for the ladies" along the lines of "Cuddy Buddy," "Next to You," "On Top of the Covers," and "Swagg Thru the Roof". Let's just say that he should have just told the label in advance, and they should have pushed this as a single-after all, it certainly worked for Paul Wall ("Girl" remains his biggest solo hit)
Name: 7 Number: 0 Repeated lines: 0

#15 "Grandma"
So many people would ask Jones, "Who taught you how to rap, your grandma?" He answers with a resounding, "YES!" Before his current identity, he used to rap in the Souf Folk group going by the name "Sache"-until his grandma encouraged him to make the people remember him by his real name. Thus inspired his heartfelt tribute to her-wishing she was still here. It also inspired what could likely be the longest outro in hip-hop history (below in its entirety):

"Man, it's crazy, y'knahmsayin?
Dis the main reason here, she the main reason why..
.. y'all listenin to me today, y'knahmsayin?
True story check it out, true story
A lot of people always used to wonder how I got up in the game
Y'knahmsayin? My grandma was, 99.9 percent of the reason y'knahmsayin?
It's crazy though, I mean, I used to go to strip clubs all the time and
try to get people to listen to my CD, you know?
And they be like who are you? And I'm like "Mike Jones"
And they'd be like WHO, y'knahmsayin?
And I used to always tell my grandma and she used to always tell me
to use that, y'knahmsayin? Cause they gon' regret what they did to me
Y'knahmsayin? So I started usin it, and it worked, y'knahmsayin?
And.. it's it's just crazy mayne y'know?
I started sayin my name a lot - y'knahmsayin?
I started givin my phone number out - y'knahmsayin?
When people was tellin me that it wasn't gon' work
My grandma was tellin me to do it, y'knahmsayin?
She told she seen a vision and, that's a hell of a vision y'knahmsayin?
And.. really I started givin out my album, I started promotin it and
all the stuff that y'all been hearin me do, I got it from her
Y'knahmsayin? And and that's the main reason, why I'm here today
Y'knahmsayin? And and it's crazy man, it's crazy y'know
I'm I'm I'm here and y'all listenin to me, y'know
So I never woulda ever thought..
..that I'd have the whole world listenin to Mike Jones, man, it's crazy man
I didn't even wanna use my real name, y'know?
But grandma was like, boy you better use that name
It's gon' blow you up one day, y'knahmsayin?
And I was like man you don't know what'chu talkin about
And now I'm here, "Who is Mike Jones?"
Holla at'cha boy.."

Amadeus' sample of Al Hudson and the Partners' "Keep Dancing" adds to the tear-jerking factor. I just hope his grandma had some advice for him about how to have a back-up plan if rap didn't work out...
Name: 5 Number: 0 Repeated lines: 1 "y'knahmsayin": 15

FINAL SCORE: 86 name drops, 14 number drops, and 32 repeated lines later, we have an album that makes for good entertainment. Nobody promoted himself like Mike Jones, and he actually has a handle on each type of track and its core audience ("Scandalous Hos" for the gold-digger victims, "5 Years From Now" for the thinkers, "Type Of Nigga U Need" for the lovers, "Grandma" for the nostalgics, and the rest for the Houston cruisers). In addition, the total gimmick-count adds a whole other level of entertainment. To compare it to any verifiable rap classic would be apples and oranges, but for what it is, I give it a 4 out of 5 spins - SOLID.

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?: Planned sophomore set "The American Dream" kept being pushed back and was later downgraded to an EP (with two songs being from "Who Is Mike Jones?"). His actual sophomore album "The Voice" dropped in April '09 to exceedingly low sales. A third album "Expect the Unexpected" was planned, but he has basically disappeared ever since-and if people like Paul Wall have their way, he'll never be heard from again. Who'd've thought that nowadays when somebody brought up Mike Jones, we'd all respond "Who?" seriously...

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