Sports Wrap: Insane March Madness, the Beginning of Baseball & More

(Sure they shot horribly, but at least Butler played smothering defense. Oh, wait...)

Once again I’m back and pretending I know more about sports than you do! However, what even a sport Nostradamus like myself didn’t see coming was the NCAA Tournament action. So without any wasted time, lets jump right into it.

College Hoops

If anyone actually bet some hard earned money on this tournament, then I feel absolutely sorry for you my friend! While usually 1 or 2 big upsets is what makes these tournaments fun and intriguing to watch, no one and I mean NO ONE saw this year’s bracket disaster happening.

The early foreshadowing of this tournament should have been seen when table raping Patino’s Louisville Cardinals lost to the barely known Morehead St. (And yes, Rick Patino raped someone in a restaurant, LOOK IT UP PEOPLE!) While VCU were setting up the next ESPN 30 for 30 documentary, and Pitt was deciding to foul on full court shots with .8 seconds left, many of us watched a tournament that hurt our brackets and souls round for round.

However, as a true college basketball fan, the first 2 rounds (technically 2nd and 3rd because the NCAA wants to squeeze as much money games as possible) may have been the most exciting 2 rounds in awhile. You had buzzer beaters, upsets, controversial calls, and anything else you could ask for. So what else could you possibly want? Oh….an actually good championship game huh? Yea…

While Butler snuck into the championship for a 2nd year in a row, their water boy Coach Brad Stevens, Kemba Walker carried UConn on his shoulders for the Big East and NCAA tourney. While the media hyped up the game as much as they could with the “who will be the top dog” campaign, in the 21 years I’ve been alive, I can safely say that I have never seen a worst championship game.

I’m not quite sure what happened to Butler, and I can’t even think of a pun worthy of describing their shooting. 18.8% FG PERCENTAGE!?! I understand that shooters sometimes have off nights, but 18.8% is unacceptable. Even Justin Beiber shot 37.8% in the Celebrity All Star Game!


(You see the way that boy crossed up Common!? If Common still had a career Beiber would of ended it!)

Uconn doesn’t get off so easy as well! 34% shooting is obviously better than 18, but you’d expect more coming from the National Championship team. Despite the bad game, UConn is still your 2011 National Champion, and maybe now Calhoun will retire with his storybook ending.

As far as next year goes, many players are hesitating about entering the draft because of the possibility of an NBA lockout. Overall, this is better for the NCAA an maybe now NBA players won’t be broke by the time they hit 50.

Football

We’re still in a lockout, if nothing changes by June then it may be some time to panic. Until then, keep Adam Shefter occupied on Twitter, we don’t want him to lose his mind from complete boredom.

MLB

Baseball season has begun! Sure, everyone is excited about it now, but let’s see how people are feeling in July when that’s the ONLY sport on television and it’s too far away from the playoffs to care!

Although we are just a couple of games into the season, would you believe if I told you that the Orioles are 1 of the 3 teams still undefeated? (That is, if they didn’t lose last night, which the probably did) The other two being Texas and Cincy, it feels like this season is pretty much continuing where last ones left off.

Unlike last year though, there are some changes that have affected the short season. Joe Nathan looks healthy after returning from an absent 2010 season after receiving elbow surgery, and looks to close out for the Twins the same with the authority he once did. The Red Sox batting average is almost as low as Butler’s shooting average, (I SAID ALMOST!) and the Pirates look like they have a young healthy ball club!

But one thing that still remains the same; Detroit has once again produced a bad sports team…

Dumbass of the Week

Milwaukee Brewers pitcher Zack Greinke began the season on the disabled list because of a fractured right rib he injured while playing pickup basketball in the offseason. The former AL Cy Young winner is expected to be out two to four weeks, for a team that desperately needs him. Did you not learn anything from Aaron Boone?!?!

In case you were strolling and couldn’t find an “NBA” bold word, that’s because there isn’t one. With 4 games left in the season, next week’s column will be solely dedicated to the NBA playoffs. With a hopeful interview from an actual expert, stop by next week to get yourself prepared for some NBA PLAYOFFS!

(Agree, disagree, or have other topics you want discussed? Comment below or email .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) and they may be answered in upcoming columns)